here we are again.

This is not the post I expected to  be writing two weeks ago. This wasn’t even the post I was hoping to be writing a week ago, and yet here it is. I thought that on the 5th we’d go in and see a beautiful little heartbeat. And when we didn’t and were scheduled to go in on the 13th to try again, even though I knew that by almost 8 weeks it should have been there already, I tried to stay positive because they gave us a printout, which they never did last time. So it gave me some hope, at least. But apparently that’s not our lucky number, and it was too good to be true. So we went away for the weekend, disconnected and got out of town on an already planned trip, and now I have another decision to make. The same one I had to make back in June. I’m heartbroken and don’t know what to think anymore.


19 Responses to “here we are again.”

  1. 1 Nicole October 18, 2011 at 12:39 am

    Oh no! I’m so sorry! T&p’s are with you.

  2. 2 wishinghopingpraying October 18, 2011 at 1:50 am

    Oh no! I am so very sorry for your loss. I was hoping you were MIA for good reasons. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I am here if you need a friend. Sending lots of love your way. ((hugs))

  3. 3 Bree October 18, 2011 at 2:05 am

    Oh no. I am so sorry. Nothing can fix this sadness. Know that many people care about you and hope the best for you. For now, shout profanities and know that you have every right. Thinking about you and your sweet family.

  4. 4 Sam October 18, 2011 at 6:58 am

    Oh no I am so sorry. Hugs.

  5. 5 mommie2be October 18, 2011 at 8:02 am

    no, no, no, no. I’m so sorry – there aren’t even words 😦

  6. 6 meegs1982 October 18, 2011 at 9:12 am

    Oh M, I’m so sorry. I know that pain and I wish I could take it away for you. Since I can’t, I’ll offer my ear if you need someone to talk to, and send you all the healing thoughts and virtual hugs I can. I’m so sorry.

  7. 7 Lisa (Datagirl) October 18, 2011 at 10:26 am

    I’m very sorry you have to do this again. You know I only hope the best for you.


  8. 8 Natalie October 18, 2011 at 10:54 am

    I’m so sorry 😦

  9. 9 strawberry October 18, 2011 at 10:57 am

    Oh no. I’m so sorry to hear this. What a shock with the betas. Sending you lots of hugs.

  10. 10 Tori October 18, 2011 at 11:58 am

    Oh no… I’m so sorry for your loss. Prayers lifted up for you for sure. And hugs.

  11. 11 thiswillbe October 18, 2011 at 1:05 pm

    My heart is breaking for you. I am so very sorry to hear this. Sending you lots of hugs and support. Please let us know if there is anything we can do.

  12. 12 alison October 18, 2011 at 1:41 pm

    Oh no. I am so sorry. I also was hoping you were MIA for better reasons. I will be thinking of you all as you decide which steps are best for your family.

  13. 13 seattlegirl October 18, 2011 at 2:18 pm

    Oh blue, I am so sorry. Thinking of you and sending hugs your way.

  14. 14 TheFamilyWay October 18, 2011 at 2:43 pm

    My thoughts are with you. I’m so sorry.

  15. 16 Dawn October 18, 2011 at 3:59 pm

    We’re sorry to hear this. If there’s anything we can do please let us know.

  16. 17 madisonpeas October 20, 2011 at 11:42 am

    I am so sorry. I know there are no good words. Sending support.

  17. 18 ann October 21, 2011 at 9:18 am

    M– 😦 im here if you need a hug or someone to just hangout with. im so sorry.

  18. 19 Amy F.W. October 30, 2011 at 10:38 am

    I’ve been thinking about you a lot, and wondering how you are doing. I know I’m late on this post but just wanted to send you some love.

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